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Young impressionable girls circled around the jerk and I fervently prayed that he'd slip up and impregnate one of the little darlings.Physics is a hard subject and each year it got even harder. I abandoned all attempts at a social life and devoted my entire existence to study.I returned home at Christmas and was cajoled into accompanying Alice and David for a curry. Alice had restarted her final year at college whilst David was micromanaging every intricate detail of their forthcoming wedding. Alice talked for a short time about her course and then enquired about progress with my degree."We've booked the Grange," David interrupted, "but the earliest they could fit us in is next summer."The Grange was a five-star hotel that was currently THE place to get married. He proceeded to tell me which company was providing the cars, who was taking the photographs and even where the flowers were being sourced. I wanted to tell him that I didn't give a shit, but was just too polite to do so.As. "I'm fucked, Cary! Totally fucked!" Why?" I asked. "What about your plan? Didn't they believe you?" Oh they believed me alright. I had everything down pat and I completelyconvinced them. The United States Government fully believes that I amgay and they were extremely happy to inform me that I would be a chartermember in the first ever, newly created by act of Congress, all gay armyunit. I was sworn in today, given my orders and a plane ticket and Ihave to be at the airport on Friday morning for my flight to basictraining." Oh shit! Your plan didn't work. What are you going to do now?" I askedhim."Do! What the fuck can I do? I'm in the fucking Army! If I don't go theycan get me for desertion. I'm screwed and I'm in a unit of nothing butfucking homos. I'll probably get literally screwed in basic training." What happened to the 'Don't ask, Don't tell' policy?" They changed it last week. No one liked the policy so some Californiacongressman came up with this plan for all gay units. This.
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